Bangladesh Adventures

Friday, August 24, 2007

Grieving Friends

High-tide grief is not the time to speak solutions. (Women who have had miscarriages say the last thing they want to hear from a friend, “You can have another baby.”) When one is grieving, it is the time for friends to be silent, to hug, and to weep.*Dee Brestin

My Dad, Charles E. Stout always said, “You need to go to support a friend, family member or acquaintance when they are mourning a lost of a loved one. No matter how close that person is to you, you show support just by being there. You don’t need to say a thing but be there. Take your children; also, kids are part of life in birth, living and death.”

*Dee Brestin continues, the friends who comfort the most:

  • Shows up.
  • Write notes telling the person about how they liked/loved the person that past away.
  • Personal note is better than a grocery store (canned) card.
  • Talk about the person that died, don’t be afraid to talk about them- the person that is mourning hasn’t forgot that person, trust me.
  • Pray for the person who lost the loved one.

In Bangladesh, the grieving process is always very close to you. People are sick or suffer at home, they die right in their own beds, and all the people of the community come by to pay their last respects. There are no retirement homes, nursing care, or a home for the aged. Grandparents are with their children and their grandchildren when they die.

Jesus is our prayer
And He is also the answer
To all our prayer

Mother Teresa of Calcutta